The Trap of Overthinking: How to Stop Spinning and Come Back to Yourself
We all do it.
Replay the conversation.
Rethink the decision.
Wonder if we missed something.
Overthinking has a way of sneaking in quietly, then taking over completely.
What starts as a single thought becomes a maze of what-ifs, should-haves, and what-now?
If you’ve ever laid awake at night, your mind racing while your body stays still, this is for you.
Prefer to listen or watch?
I reflect on overthinking in this Slow Talks episode right here:
What Is Overthinking?
Overthinking looks like problem-solving.
It sounds productive.
It even feels like caring.
But most of the time, overthinking isn’t helping.
It’s stretching a small, manageable moment until it fills every corner of your mind.
You start to believe:
“If I just think it through one more time, I’ll feel better.”
“If I consider every angle, I’ll be prepared.”
“If I get it right in my head, I can finally rest.”
But peace doesn’t live at the end of a mental maze. It lives here. Now. In your body. In your breath.
Why Overthinking Feels So Urgent
Overthinking often shows up when we’re anxious, tired, or unsure.
It feels urgent. Like something must be solved right now.
But most of the time, that urgency is just fear.
Fear of uncertainty, of getting it wrong, of not being in control.
And the more we spin, the further we get from clarity.
Because thinking isn’t always insight.
Sometimes, it’s just noise.
Waiting for the fog to clear
Imagine standing in a heavy fog, squinting to see the horizon. You tense your body. Your eyes strain.
But squinting doesn’t clear the fog. It only tires you.
Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is stop trying.
Let the fog clear on its own.
And while you wait, you rest.
You breathe.
You trust that clarity will return when it’s ready.
How to Stop Overthinking in the Moment
Here’s a simple practice you can try next time your thoughts won’t settle:
1. Notice it.
Gently say:
“This is overthinking.”
“This is my mind trying to protect me.”
2. Come back to the body.
Place a hand on your chest
Feel your feet on the floor
Look at something real and steady: a tree, a candle, the texture of your blanket
3. Give yourself permission not to fix it.
Say quietly:
“Not every thought needs a response.”
“I can rest, even without the answers.”
It sounds simple, but these moments of presence are powerful.
They remind your nervous system that you’re safe. That you can soften.
What If the Thoughts Return?
They will. That’s okay.
Overthinking isn’t something to eliminate.
It’s something to recognize and gently step away from.
Again and again.
Not every problem needs a solution.
Not every feeling needs to be fixed.
Some just want to be felt.
And sometimes, overthinking is how we avoid that.
The tenderness of not knowing.
The softness of just being.
You Can Rest Now
If your mind is spinning tonight,
if you feel like you need to think it all through before you can relax,
let this be your permission to pause.
You don’t need to fix the future.
You don’t need to solve everything before you sleep.
Your peace isn’t hiding in some perfect thought.
It’s already here.
In your breath.
In your body.
In the space where nothing has to be solved.
Come back to it, as often as you need to.
